Why do so many of us find it difficult to sit down and journal?  We can write to-do lists, notes to others, texts, even gratitude lists.  But there’s something about the free-form writing that gets us stuck.  For some, it’s the fear of examining difficult topics or feeling certain emotions.  In my case, I start to look at what I’m writing through the lens of what someone would think if they read it.  I’m even doing it right now.

So why is it important that I try to write this blog?  It’s important that I try because it’s difficult for me to do, because I want to improve in my writing, and because I made the commitment to myself to try.  Just like seated meditation.   Doing things mindfully isn’t that difficult for me.  I can walk mindfully, eat mindfully, even butter my toast mindfully.  But I need the seated time because it doesn’t come as easily.  I want to improve at it.  I need the seated time because I committed to doing it. 

My favorite idea in Stoic philosophy comes from Marcus Aurelius.  He discussed the idea that “the obstacle is the way.”  He wrote “the impediment to action advances action.  What stands in the way becomes the way.”  The answer to every difficult situation isn’t to just push through.  By the same token, what does it reinforce in our perception of ourselves if we default to avoiding or working around the difficult task?  I talk a lot in sessions about the idea of “process vs. content.”  In short, I think that often times, when it concerns issues that bring people to therapy, what we do can be less important than the act of doing.  Regardless of how good a meditation session is, or how good this blog entry is, the act of meditating and writing is already a success, simply because I’m doing what isn’t easy. 

Following through on what I commit to doing for others is an act of respect and love.  Following through on my commitments to myself is an act of self-respect and self-care.  It’s treating myself the way I want others to treat me.  Just because I’m the giver and the receiver doesn’t make it any less important.  Following through on my commitments to myself reinforces that I am worth effort.  I am worth struggle.  I am competent. 

So, once I click “publish,” my mission is accomplished.  I hope this resonates with someone.  But even if no one reads it, it’s an important and successful effort.